The Twin Flame Dilemma: Why I Chose to Stop Offering Twin Flame Advice

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The twin flame concept is often intermingled with the idea of the soulmate. While both types of relationships can bring about intense life changes, the twin flame concept often leads to an unhealthy attachment to the idea of someone being “The One.”


Now, I’m not discouraging anyone from seeing their partner as their soulmate, especially those of you in healthy and thriving relationships. However, I aim to help you understand the common dynamics within the twin flame connection and journey, and explain why I let go of my own twin flame journey and stopped providing services around manifesting twin flames.


What is a Twin Flame?


According to individual accounts from those who have experienced such a profound connection, a twin flame connection is an intense soul connection where one (or both) believes their partner to be their “other half” or “mirror soul.” Individuals who have experienced this connection claim to feel an incredible depth due to shared pains, traumas, thoughts, ideas, and beliefs. They believe their partner reflects their deepest strengths, weaknesses, desires, vulnerabilities, and more. This “other half” supposedly goes through similar experiences and feels the same things, whether together or apart.


Signs of a Twin Flame Relationship


1. Instant Recognition: Twin flames often have an intense feeling of knowing each other and feeling instantly comfortable. There will be an instant connection that has one or both parties feeling as if they have known the other for years and that they are fated to be together. 

2. Shared Similarities: They may share interests in music, life goals, past experiences, traumas, and values. 

3. Complementary Differences: Their differences balance each other and foster personal growth, inspiring each other to become better versions of themselves.

4. Mirroring Insecurities: Twin flames can amplify feelings of insecurity, fear, and doubt. For instance, if you feel undeserving of love, your twin flame might mirror this belief.

5. Reopening Wounds: They may reopen unhealed wounds from past traumas, causing you to relive certain experiences you might not realize you're still attached to.


The Toxic Side of Twin Flames


These reflections do not excuse abusive relationships. However, the toxic side of the twin flame dynamic often excuses harmful behaviors as “part of the twin flame journey.” This can perpetuate unhealthy attachments and patterns.


One toxic aspect is the runner-chaser dynamic. Here, one person tries to escape the relationship, leading to emotional or physical withdrawal, sometimes permanently. The “chaser” tends to obsessively pursue the relationship, often through unhealthy behaviors like cyberstalking, begging, and closing off to other forms of love.



Such dynamics share traits with toxic relationships, including avoidant attachment styles, where one partner is distant and the other is clingy. The runner-chaser dynamic can involve stonewalling and gaslighting, common in abusive relationships.


My Journey and Decision


As a spiritualist, I was deeply invested in finding my twin flame. I offered tarot readings to help others find or heal their twin flame connections. However, I realized that this investment was hindering my growth and chances of finding true love. I was entangled with a toxic person I believed to be my twin flame, and this belief was damaging.


Letting go of the twin flame concept was liberating. I shifted my focus to offering cord-cutting services and generalized tarot readings. Now, as I work towards expanding as a manifestation coach and teaching the Law of Assumption, I recognize that my readings should serve two purposes: to explain current circumstances and how clients can change themselves to change those circumstances, and for entertainment.


Utilizing my skills in this new way has been freeing and has left me more confident in my true abilities as a practitioner of the Law of Assumption, a tarot reader, and a manifestation coach. As I continue to shift my intentions toward helping others understand the Law of Assumption and how it can work for them, I recognise my true interests and my strengths as an individual seeking to enhance the spiritual community with my own knowledge and experience. 


**Inspiration for the knowledge and structure on twin flames discussed in this blog post taken from this article at Medical News Today:

https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/twin-flame-meaning


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